For a little while this space has been my favorite confidante. It has given me a place to share my most intimate thoughts, my most personal views. I have relied on it to get me through the days when I am teeming with the excitement, the inspiration, the passion that I have for this modern-day TV fairy tale. It’s been quite interesting, to say the least. The blog has now been visited more than half a million times. No tags, no keywords, and never monetized.

But I will never take credit for something that is not my sole doing. If not for the phenomenon that is Aldub, the traffic to the site would have been as clear as an old town dirt road. The most brilliant writers all over the world can write the best literary pieces known to men, but without the right subject and the right audience they will remain obscure, indistinct.

After Tamang Panahon I realized that I have been stuck on a chapter’s end for a bit too long. To see what lies ahead, to know how my own story will progress along, I felt the need to finally turn the page over. So I busied myself with things I normally got myself busy with before my madness- studying, competition shooting, HTPC building, Islands of Adventure- Orlando, Netflix, Xbox One, Steam. That’s a lotta stuff to be excited about, right?

Wrong.

I find myself each and every night staring at my blank laptop screen. It has become a burden trying to find the words I need to articulate what I want to say. Every letter seems out of place, every sentence incongruous, every line is losing all meaning. It is not for a lack of insights nor of thoughts. I have so much inside that I am dying to tell the world- but woefully I no longer seem to know how to get them down into words.

Then I regress back into watching replays of Kalyeserye.

Maybe I am melodramatic, but even though I find these episodes a bit cyclic and more deliberate I still find myself captivated. I laugh, I smile, I tear up every once in a while. It does not help that Alden seems to be showing real sincerity nowadays, the big change screaming the evident reversal of character between him and Maine. And it does not help that Meng has bloomed a whole lot since! Can I make it any more obvious?

Oh well.

I know someday I can get over you guys. Today may not be the day, but someday.

Balang araw, magbabalik-tanaw ako sa mga sandaling ako’y inyong napaluha at ako’y mapapangiti. Balang araw, magbabalik-tanaw ako sa mga sandaling ako’y inyong napangiti at ako’y mapapaluha.

But right now, I just can’t.

I give up.

I give in. ~ Vilo

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