Dumating na Ang Tamang Panahon.
Tisoy has been waiting for this day. He woke up with the early morning sun wiggling through the middle crack in the window curtain. It was a dreamless sleep, and for the first time in a long time, he felt a sense of giddy enthusiasm. He saw his reflection on the mirror against the wall- a bright smiling face, in the still-dark room. “Wish I may”, he whispered to himself. The melody played out in his head. The words unable to escape his thoughts:
“Wish that I could say these words tonight,
Wish I have the courage, wish I might;
Have the chance to show you, speak what’s on my mind,
While you’re right next to me, I’ve loved you from the start.”
Words can never express what he wants to say to you, Meng, but they have to make do because they are all that he has. He can no longer count the times he tried to stop himself from just picking up the phone, dial your number and tell you how much you really meant to him.
He never knew you would ensnare his hardened heart. He has kept it hidden, buried under his numbed up reticence, his self-imposed restraint. He tried to dispense with what he was feeling and told himself it was just an infatuation, ephemeral, fleeting- you would never have what it takes to make him fall!
But he was wrong. Dead wrong.
Because the longer this thing went on, the more he felt that he truly did care. He just wishes he had the courage to accept the realization that what he was looking for was right there all this time, across that screen, where his kisses bore witness to the longings of his heart.
And yes, he really does miss you. Sometimes he wishes he was with you every time you go to bed- to watch you fall asleep, to gently kiss you goodnight. He melts at the sound of your voice. He finds himself weeping at random little things as silly as a simple thought of you. He dreams of you! Not about you, but about him and you, together, holding hands on the beach, watching the sunset, silhouettes fading into the night.
He has found his place in the world, Meng. Right there, by your side.
He doesn’t really know what he did in his life to deserve you. Maybe the Lolas are fairy godmothers after all and you are his one sweet granted wish- the miracle he’s been waiting for all his life. He has never been so stoked as he is right now knowing from this moment on he will have more time to be with you everyday- to sing sweet love songs together, to laugh together, to listen to your stories, to hold you close.
The wide-eyed gaze, the sheepish, shy smile, the really cute way you tried to hide your delight. That was the start of something wonderful for him and you. He was just sitting there, waiting for something, anything. Then came you, the unexpected you- with your eyes glowing, your pretty little face blushing. That’s when he realized he has truly fallen in love.
Not along the way. Not just today.
But right from the start.
Exactly 100 days ago. ~ Vilo