You Are The Reason
By: Ketama

How can I forget
The longings of my heart
It’s you I think of
Night and day

I know I couldn’t touch you
I know I couldn’t hold you
Though I wish I really could
Just care for you

You are the reason
The seasons of my life
You’re everything I wish and live for
Give me an answer
Show me the way
You’re breaking me, leaving me in pain

You’re the burning flame
In my heart and in my mind
In the silence of the night
I can hear you

My thoughts are all about you
Alive and true to me
But now I really have you
Only in my dreams

Loving you changes everything
It’s given me the strength
And it’s all because of you

You’re the burning flame
In my heart and in my mind
In the silence of the night
I can hear you

I know I couldn’t touch you
I know I couldn’t hold you
Though I wish I really could
Just care for you

You’re breaking me
Leaving me in pain

http://youtu.be/JOIP_Yl6cHY

Will I ever get over you?

As the song say, as soon as forever is through, I’ll be over you.

But when exactly will my forever be through? I never can see an end in sight to my affection. I never could imagine myself breaking free. I never could imagine myself waking up one day disenchanted, devoid of my infatuation.

Maybe that is the reason why I could never understand how anybody would fail to see the things I see in you. Maybe that is why I could never understand how anybody could not love you the same way that I do.

Yet, deep in my heart I know. Someday, that desolate day will come.

And when it does, please don’t cry. Never let tears of sadness grace that pretty face, I never was able to stand them. You came into my life like an angel on a tempest-tossed night so leave me with the same radiance. Let my last thought of you be like my first- spectacular, breathtaking.

Because when that day comes your name will altogether escape my memory. In my blank, thoughtless eyes you will be oddly familiar but sadly unrecognizable. I will sense that somewhere, in the course of my gloomy, uneventful, obscure life, you meant something to me, but I will no longer remember why.

Someday, when that day finally comes, you will have known..

I’m already over you. ~ Vilo

Should I say or shall I hold?
This much I can do.
Chances been elusive since
I felt this way for you..

Let me give your heart’s desire,
Let me spark that first love fire;
But you showed not much you told
That I can never be..

Waiting for the time,
Wishing for the love
Hoping that someday you’ll see
So much more in me;
But it just breaks my heart
When you smile and close your eyes;
The love that I feel keeps going
Stronger day by day..

I feel alone, I don’t know why
But still can’t say goodbye.
And dreams I have that I’m with you,
Bring tears across my eyes..

Waiting for the time,
Wishing for the love
Hoping that someday you’ll see
So much more in me;
But it just breaks my heart
When you smile and close your eyes;
The love that I feel keeps going
Stronger day by day..

Deep within my heart
I can never smile;
Deep within this love just kept on
Hurting me apart.
Take me to the skies,
Hold me till I cry;
Make me forget that I am
Just wishing upon a star..

*A song I wrote a few years back. Yeah, its way better with the melody, but what can I do? I just felt like sharing. Ok, bye.

“Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice.” ~ Steve Jobs

For all the times I felt cheated, I complained
You know how I love to complain
For all the wrongs I repeated, though I was to blame
I still cursed that rain
I didn’t have a prayer, didn’t have a clue
Then out of the blue..

Ilang pagsubok na ang dumaan sa buhay mo. Ilang beses mo nang tinanong, “Bakit ako?” Ilang beses ka nang halos sumuko, pero pinaglaban mo. Ganyan ka pinalaki ng mga magulang mo- matatag, sa anumang hamon ng walang habag na mundo. Kaya siguro ang Diyos, kumakampi sa iyo ng todo. Binigay nya sa iyo ang sa katagal-tagal nang panahon na hinahanap mo.

You never thought this was going to go the distance. Nasanay ka na sa mundo ng teatro. Alam mo na ito ay mapusok, mapanlinlang, huwad. So you tried holding back. Sinubukan mong ingatan ang iyong puso. I sensed that right away, dude. You tried to protect yourself. Napagdaanan mo na to, this is not something new. You’ve been hurt before, hindi ka na magpapaloko.

Ngunit sadyang mabait sa iyo ang tadhana. Hindi mo binalak, hindi mo inakala. Hindi mo inasahan na darating sya. Serendipity daw sabi nila. Siguro nga. Talaga naman kasing pinagpapala ang taong tulad mo na likas na mapagkumbaba, may takot sa Diyos, may paggalang sa kapwa.

Si Meng. Siya ang gantimpala mo. “You didn’t have a prayer, you didn’t have a clue, but then out of the blue”– binigay sya sayo. Simula nun, andami nang nagbago sa buhay mo. Mas lalo kang hinangaan ng tao. Ang Kalyeserye nyo, naging patok sa buong mundo. Mapababae man o mapalalaki, bata o matanda, walang nakawala- lahat ay nahumaling sa istorya ng umuusbong na pag-iibigan nyo ni Meng.

Nung una ay kitang-kita mo ang kanyang paghanga. Hindi maikaila, masyado syang mapahayag sa nararamdaman nya. Kaya naman ikaw, nag-aalinlangan na. Ang tanong mo sa iyong sarili, “Eto na nga ba? Hindi ka pa sigurado kung ready ka na nga. Hanggang dumating ang araw na kayo ay nagkita. Ibang hatak ang iyong nadarama. Naguguluhan ka ngunit gumagaan ang loob mo sa kanya. Hindi mo maintindihan, hindi mo maunawaan. Eto na nga ba ang iyong magpakailanman?

Kaya tuwang-tuwa ka, nung sinabi ni lola na pwede ka nang sumuyo. Pinaghandaan mo ng sobra ang pag akyat mo ng ligaw sa dalaga. Sa harana mo, sinong puso ang hindi manghihina. Ngunit si Meng, napapailing lang sya. Di bale, pupuntahan mo naman sya, makakasama mo na ang napakagandang prinsesa, kahit ilang saglit lang, alam mo magiging masayang-masaya ka.

God gave me you to show me what’s real
There’s more to life than just how I feel
And all that I’m worth is right before my eyes
And all that I live for though I didn’t know why
Now I do, ’cause God gave me you

Malayo ang nilakbay mo, hanggang dumating ka na nga. Pagpasok mo sa mansion, hinahanap mo na sya. Nung pinasyal ka ng mga lola, pinapakita yung mga lumang larawan nila, pilit mong pinalalabas na interesado ka. Pero paggalang mo lang yun sa kanila. I know it was all a haze, ni hindi mo na maalala ang mga sandaling yun. Kasi, si Meng lang ang hinahanap mo. Sya lang ang nasa isip mo. “Asan na sya? Kelan ko sya makikita?” Pabalik-balik sa diwa mo.

Kaya nung pinaupo ka na sa sofa, ang lakas na ng tibok ng puso mo. Eto na sya, papanaug na ng hagdanan. Sumilip ka pa, para bang di ka makapaghintay, eh sandali lang naman bubungad na sya sa iyo ng buong-buo, pero sumilip ka pa rin. Inaaninag mo. Kaytagal ng mga segundo! Parang nag e slow-mo ang boung mundo!

Hanggang tuluyan mo na ngang masilayan ang mala-diwatang kagandahan ni Meng. Napatayo ka! Napangiti ka ng sobra. Kilala ko ang ngiting yun, hindi papoging ngiti yun. Nawala lahat ang poise mo! Natutulala ka pa nung binibigay mo ang mga bulaklak mong dala. Di mo alam anong gagawin. At nasabi mo na lang, “Ok ka lang ba?” Sumagot sya, “Ok lang”. Ayun, nabaliw na ang mga lola! Pero ikaw, todo focus mo sa babaeng nasa harap mo. Pinipisil-pisil mo ang mga daliri sa mga kamay mo, niyayakap mo mga binti mo, balisa ka, hindi ka mapakali. “All that I’m worth is right before my eyes” Bumalik sa isip mo ang linyang yun. Andyan na sya. Ang halaga ng boung buhay mo, ang dahilan kung bakit ipinanganak ka sa mundong ito, nandyan na sya, nasa harap mo na.

For all the times I wore my self pity like a favorite shirt
All wrapped up in that hurt
For every glass I saw, I saw half empty
Now it overflows like a river through my soul
From every doubt I had, I’m finally free
I truly believe

Sumagi sa isip mo ang lahat ng nangyari sa nagdaang lampas sampung linggo. Dati naman alam mo may doubts ka. Akala mo aktingan lang, pampasaya lang. Laking gulat mo nang isang araw, nalaman mo na lang, nahuhulog ka na. Pilit mong pinigilan, pero sadyang mapagbiro ang tadhana. Kung kelan ayaw mo pa sana muna, saka mo naramdaman na hindi mo na talaga kaya. Mahirap kalabanin ang damdaming inaalagaan, iniingatan.

Yan ang napala mo kaka-stalk sa kanya. Wag mo nang i-deny, wala ding maniniwala. Ginusto mong makilala sya, malaman ang boung buhay nya. Napasobra ang alaga mo sa nararamdaman mo para sa kanya, hanggang napuno ka at di mo na naitatago pa. Hindi mo na alintana ang nakaraan. Tuluyan ka nang nabighani. Nawala nang lahat ang mga hinagpis mo, parang nagbago ang iyong mundo. Lahat ng pag-aalinlangan, mga pangamba, biglang naglaho nung makasama mo sya. Kung dati nakakulong ka pa sa mga karanasang binigay sa iyo ng napakalupit mong mundo, ngayon, sabi nga dun sa kanta, “From every doubt I had, I’m finally free!” Malaya ka na. Malayang-malaya ka na.

God gave me you to show me what’s real
There’s more to life than just how I feel
And all that I’m worth is right before my eyes
And all that I live for though I didn’t know why
Now I do, ’cause God gave me you

Kaya napakasaya mo! Habang pinaglalapit kayo, nahihirapan kang pigilan ang sarili mo. Nung unang magdikit yung mga balat nyo, naitulak lang ni Lola Tinidora si Meng. Pero ramdam mo yun. Ramdam na ramdam mo yun. Napatingin ka sa braso mo, napahipo ka sa parte kung saan nagkalapat yung mga balat nyo. Si Meng, napatingin sya sa iyo. Parang nagtatanong, “Ano yun?” It was the slightest of touch, but why does it burn too much? You can never forget that sensation. Hanggang ngayon, I know, napapatingin ka pa rin paminsan-minsan sa braso mo. Dito yun. Ramdam mo pa rin ang munting init na yun.

Nung pinag dubsmash na ang linyang “God Gave Me You”, eh dba napaiyak ka nung kinakanta mo? Ngayon uli, nangingilid na naman ang luha sa mga mata mo. Pero dapat wag pahalata, nakatitig si Meng. Isang bihirang pagkakataon na nakatitig sya sayo, kasi ikaw ang hindi makatingin. Naluluha ka. Sobra. Kaya dinaan mo na lang sa tawa, sabay pahid. Pero nakita ni Meng yun, at napapangiti sya.

Tinatanong ka nya kung kakanta kaba, sinabi mo tapos na. Kaya pala, di pala nya nakita nung binuhos mo ang puso’t kaluluwa mo sa pagkanta. Sayang, pero me replay nga naman, sigurado ako, mapapaluha sya pag napanood na nya. Kahit pusong bato mapapaluha sa ginawa mo. Inaamin ko, napasobra din nang konti ang emosyon ko, kaya napasabay ako sa pagluha mo. Konti lang naman. Sabihin na lang natin ng ganyan. Nakakahiya din eh, kalalaki kong tao.

In your arms I’m someone new
With ever tender kiss from you
Oh, must confess
I’ve been blessed

Balik tayo sa mesa, nagka chance ka to get a tender kiss, hindi man direkta pero ganun na rin yun. Sinunggaban mo ang pagkakataon. Akala mo di namin mapapansin. Akala mo di nya mapapansin. Akala mo lang yun. Hinimud ng bibig mo ang tinidor na dumapo sa matatamis na labi ni Meng. Dalawang beses, dude. Sa pansit tsaka sa cake. At sinundan pa ng labi mo ang lapat ng lipstick niya sa basong pina-inuman mo sa kanya. Sinadya mo, wala sa script yun. Patago. Ginawa mo nung na distract sya, nung di sya nakatingin sa yo. Pero me replay nga dba? Wala kang kawala sa prinsesa. You now know that she knows. And I know, masaya ka na alam na nya.

Nagbunyi ang boung mundo nang umiinom si Meng sa baso at nahawakan niya ang kanang kamay mo. Sabi ko, aba, me da moves na rin ang Meng namin! Pero nakita ko, di ka nagpatalo, hinawakan mo rin ang kanang kamay nya, dun sa likod ng baso. She was touching the back of your hand, but you wanted to touch hers too. Iba ang pakiramdam pag ikaw ang humahawak kesa ikaw ang hinahawakan. Hinding-hindi mo palalagpasin ang pagkakataon na yun. Magalit na si Lola, aksidente lang naman, pasensyahan na.

Sa mga mumunting moments na yun, that’s when you knew. “I’ve been blessed.” Talaga nga palang pinagpala ka.

God gave me you to show me what’s real
There’s more to life than just how I feel
And all that I’m worth is right before my eyes
And all that I live for though I didn’t know why
Now I do, ’cause God gave me you

Totoo na talaga. Pati picture na kayo ay magkasama, hindi na edited, hindi na photoshop, totoo na. Hindi ka makapaniwala, hindi na one foot ang pagitan nyong dalawa, kaya pinagpapawisan ka. Andyan pa rin kasi sya, nasa harap mo na. Di sya makatitig sa yo, sobrang na conscious, kasi ang lapit-lapit mo. Ilang beses nyang sinubukan, at ilang beses syang nabigo. Masyadong malakas ang dating mo, di nya kinaya ang appeal mo.

Pero ikaw din naman. Kunyaring in control, pero di maalis ang tingin mo sa kanya. Pinagpapawisan na para bang malamig na Coca Cola. Halos magkandarapa ka sa kilig. Eto na kasi sya, nasa tabi mo na. Ang bango-bango ng buhok nya. Kita ko yun, inamoy mo. Banayad lang ang tulak ni Lola Tinidora sa yo, tinodo mo. Akala ko hahalikan mo na, buti na lang nakapagpigil ka. Pero dun ka talaga sumilong sa may leeg nya, sabay amoy sa halimuyak ng buhok nya. Wag kang masyadong padadala, baka masanay ka. Hahanap-hanapin mo pa.

Sa pag alis mo ng mansion, may liham syang inabot. For your eyes only daw, kaya wala na kami dun. Pero bakas sa iyo ang lubos na kasiyahan. Nang nasa labas ka na, ang amo ng iyong mukha, nagpapahiwatig na sa araw na ito naging kumpleto ka. Hindi ka makaalis ng mabilisan, tinititigan mo pa rin sya. Nilulunod mo ang mga mata mo sa kagandahan ng tanawing nakaladlad sa yo. Iniisip mo, kelan ko uli matatamasa ito.

At napangiti ka dahil nauunawaan mo na. Malapit na. Malapit na malapit na.

Ang Tamang Panahon. Abot kamay mo na. ~ Vilo

“Consult not your fears but your hopes and your dreams. Think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed in, but with what is still possible for you to do.” ~ Pope John XXIII

How time flies.

If not for the opportunity that you were given, you would have tried your chance at becoming a flight attendant- to explore the world with a set of sturdy iron wings. Oh how innocent you were into thinking that was the only way to fly!

I know you still recall how you felt that day, one fine Saturday in July, not knowing if it would all work out the way you want it to. The opportunity to explore who you really are and what you wanted to become was at hand. You were ecstatic, ready to take on this more electrifying chapter in your life. But deep inside, the pessimist in you was still in doubt. So many what-ifs its frightening, weakening, absolutely petrifying.

But you took the plunge anyway, taking with you the uncertainties, the worries and the fears and using them as your springboard to chase a dream, secret and ultimate, as you call it. Hoping with all hopes that you will flourish.

And flourish you did.

The camera was very easy on you. Or maybe it’s the other way around. You’ve been so comfortable in front of the camera that it cannot but respond to you as tenderly as a friend you’ve always known all your life. You blossomed graciously, like a butterfly so fragile yet oh so beautiful to the eyes. You are so genuine, you became the people’s new sweetheart. You captured our hearts like nobody had for a very long time. You captured the whole world like it has always been there, in the palm of your hands.

Along the way, you have become stronger. You had your share of physical, mental and emotional disarray. This new world, with all its deceits and pretenses hidden behind its blinding glitters, confused you. Its chaotic structure pushed you to your limits, to the point of overwhelming exhaustion! Any other woman would have crumpled and shriveled. Any other woman would have run to a dark corner and sniveled. Any other woman would have given up and faded. But you are not just any other woman.

And that endeared you to millions more of our kind.

Today, another Saturday, almost to when September ends, I have a strong intuition that you are going to be re-launched, with an overwhelmingly grander fanfare than your first one. This is the next chapter in the story of your life.

But now you have become more than just the butterfly. You are coming out like a baby eagle fresh out of the eagle’s nest. You are standing on the edge, looking up at the bright blue sky, ready to take that first jump towards whatever lies ahead, with the knowledge that the world is ready for your taking! Yes, still uncertain, but with purposeful conviction that, even without those sturdy iron wings, you are finally ready to fly!

Eto na Meng, lilipad ka na..

So spread your wings and fly like you’ve never flown before! Soar high, as high as your free spirit can take you. Don’t worry about falling because we will always be down here, constantly gazing up at the beautiful you, ready to catch you however high you fall to nourish you and launch you back to where you truly belong: up there with the brightest of stars- where your destiny awaits, where your dreams reside. ~ Vilo

Much has been said in the comments section of my blog last Sunday and it has been a torment for me trying my hardest to moderate. Sleep is a word whose meaning I no longer remember, worse, I get to read the ghastliest point of views that will never see the light of day, at least not on my little piece of web space. But then again, I lost my right to complain the moment I pressed that publish button.

Just to cool our raging passions a little bit, let me put my rational thinking and objective hat on and forget for a few minutes that I am a fan.

So, how did we actually get here?

The truth is, this is reality TV at its finest. This is not your usual, run-of-the-mill telenovela that are fully scripted even up to the color of the socks that a character is wearing. The draw to the show is more to its being real than its being reel. Remember this all started with a real-life “crush” that was spun off to create the phenomenon that it has become today. This is a different genre that is revolutionary to Philippine Television, and most of us are still in shock or are still trying to recover from the confusion.

We have been cast into the fray, in a show that challenges or affirms traditional values. It is banking on social themes that are very relevant to our society’s frame of mind. It mimics our everyday scuffles and struggles through life. And we are conditioned to identify with the characters, to get emotionally involved. This is why everybody can easily relate to it.

Real people with real life problems, how they overcome or succumb. These are all part of the grand drama that captured the fancy of our naturally romantic psyche.

The gauge for which its influence on the audience is measured is through fan participation and interaction, which, at this day and age, is primarily through social media. And the more that people talk about it, the more it is relevant, the more interest is generated. The vicious and the virtuous, the naïve and the competent, the feeble and the firm- all thrown into one big mix of discourse that continuously fuel the raging fire of fandom.

Yes, we have been captured. We cannot but take sides. We are encouraged to take sides. But there can never be a wrong side.

Whether we are partial towards one character or the other, for the both of them, for all of them or for neither of them, we are expected to feel and react that way. The clash of ideas over who is more emotionally invested, who tends to gain or lose, who is doing more or less- these are the very reasons why the act is thriving, continuously shaping our morals and principles as a society in the real world.

And then I regress back to being a fan before I douse the fire that has made this fandom the greatest in the history of Philippine entertainment.

I really find nothing wrong with people articulating their ideas and sentiments as to how they would want this spectacle to play out, for all we know, the production is also taking cues from the social pulse and in a way this is where fans may be consulted as to how they want the story to unfold.

I really find nothing wrong with people trying to defend one character or chastising the other for some mundane things as on-screen reactions and non-reactions or with trying to read through each and every detail of the characters’ expressions, it does not at all influence anything other than feed our appetite for explanations of all things inexplainable.

But sometimes we get so absorbed in our emotions that we resort to insinuations that are downright disdainful, disrespectful and judgmental. However plausible the rationalization for why we are so emotionally invested in this tandem, there still remains the reality that these characters are real people and they get affected by what they hear or read about themselves in social media, especially coming from their own followers. The more we drown in the fervor of trying to make this love story run at our own call, we forget we are already hurting the very same people that we have come to love and admire the most.

It is on this note that I extend my most sincere apologies to Maine and Alden, in behalf of myself, and all the others who may have drifted far from the appropriate expressions of fan passion, consciously or unintentionally. I hope you find it in your hearts to understand and forgive. Godspeed. ~ Vilo

Charms can only get you so much. True love is not always smooth and savvy, most times its a bit awkward, crude. To accomplish your mission, sometimes you need to break free from character and relentlessly pursue. No matter the consequence. ~ Vilo

The language of true love is well understood,

even without saying a single word.

This is awkward.

I mean, I don’t even think this is appropriate. But I got here, so let’s just see how this goes.

From a guy to another, Alden, let me just start off with this: I know how you operate. In some way or another, all men are practically the same. We guard our feelings well. We use ambivalence and show disinterest even though we really like our girl. This is our defense mechanism. Back in our minds we know we must have a fall back position in the unfortunate eventuality that it does not work out too well. And the way we do that is to make it appear that we were not really that interested in the first place. Yeah, let’s be honest, even for just this once.

Some girls might find this a little bit sexist- I apologize and please understand that this is not my intention. This is what happens when we are too sincere- people sometimes get hurt. Nonetheless, let me elaborate on what I was going for.

Men usually use the same approaches when it comes to courtship. The most common of which is the giving of gifts. We don’t really know if girls fall for it, we know there are some that get offended, but most often than not, they do their job well. We can’t help it. I even dare say it is a human instinct, on the part of a man at least, to catch the attention of women by giving gifts. These gifts may cost a lot of money or they may not cost anything at all, but a gift is a gift is a gift. Believe me, men throughout history did some pretty grave things just to accomplish this. I remember I had to save up two weeks worth of my school allowance just so I can buy a gift for the girl that caught my affection. Did she actually like it? I don’t know. But I was proud of myself for being able to sacrifice hungry days just to get my girl something that she can remember me by.

Now back to what I was driving at.

This was the same approach you used, Alden. I saw what you did there. You started showering Maine with flowers, chocolates, teddy bears, food and whatnot. Oh, I know, your good looks alone can get you any girl that you want, but as men are as men will be- you chose to work it.

And the effect was undeniable. The look on Maine’s face, her demeanor, whenever she gets surprise gifts from you, is very revealing. Or her act is too good, well maybe. But anybody can see, there is something in her smile, in the sparkle of her eyes that says she appreciates the thoughtfulness. The more you press your charm the more she responds- like a child giggling every time she beholds her very first crush.

You have ensnared her. You were right there, Alden. You had her from the get-go. This was all too easy.

Until you got tested.

In one episode, Lola Nidora asked if you were already serious about your feelings, not with Yaya Dub, but with Maine. You hid behind your pillow and avoided a straight answer. (Edited: Credit to Kathleen)

Everybody gasped! That was a total letdown! That hurt like hell, man!

You messed up. BIG TIME.

I’m sure you saw the look on Maine’s face in the background, the disappointment was very apparent. I could have sworn she was secretly hoping that you would say, or at least “ACT” in the affirmative. That would have sealed the romance. But no, you chose to be playful about it.

Later that day, Maine took to twitter and said everybody should be calm and you two were just out there to make the fans happy, which you reiterated on your own twitter post. That same night, Maine posted a “sigh”.

Maybe I was a bit over dramatic. Maybe I just read into it a little bit deeper than I probably should have. That sigh could mean a million different things. Why I chose to relate that post with what happened earlier in the day, I don’t know. I just did.

But the following days Maine began to drift away. I sensed it. We all sensed it. I know that you sensed it. She was not the same. She regressed to the Yaya Dub character that the audience began to feel it, the acts became a bit humdrum, monotonous. The spark is no longer there.

But I give you credit you are one hell of a charmer! You started opening up and enamored her back where you want her to be. You begin to let your guard down and people started reading into you. You showed sincerity like you never did before. Maybe you realized this was something that can work out? I’m not sure. But you are that good, man.

The most apparent show of your real emotions happened during your first meeting. The spark between the two of you was unquestionable. Epic. The whole fandom was ecstatic, thrilled, and very thankful to have witnessed something that is quite possibly as real and as fascinating as the first ray of sunshine in the morning.

Maine later said, “It was nice seeing you…. so nice. I am very glad.” That was as honest an impression as it can be. I was captivated by the fact that she said a very simple phrase but dang! That hit the right spot! To which you responded quite casually, “Nice seeing you too, sayang hindi man lang ako naka shake hands sayo.” I was like, really? That’s it? That was your reply? You can do better than that! Oh well, maybe it was just me and my penchant for words that are overly melodramatic.

After that moment you came out a different man. We can sense the change in you. I can sense the change in you. Funny how well men can relate with other men- the more you wanted to hide your real feelings, the more they became very ostensive. You now wear your heart out on your sleeve. The second meeting proved that point, you were overcome with the moment and you bared your soul. We saw a different person in you, Alden- we saw Richard Reyes Faulkerson, Jr.

On your 2^nd monthsary episode, a few days before your “first date” with Maine, you got caught red-handed again, with those really catchy clichés you did with your fan signs. Oh man, was I proud! I could have screamed at the top of my voice: Alden, you rock! And with this was a fervent prayer: Don’t you dare mess this up, man. Take really good care of this very precious princess. You don’t know how lucky you are.

The 12.1M day came. You looked dazzling, she was exquisite! Everybody was rooting for the both of you to finally get some time to talk with each other, to laugh together, to at least touch each other’s hand. But all that transpired fell short of our modest expectations. Were we disappointed? Hell yes! But eventually, we understood the reasons. That’s just us, the all too faithful fandom. We endure.

You were disappointed too, I can tell. I’m judging, yes, but come on man, maglolokohan pa ba tayo? The segment ended with you writing, “So close yet so far”. And I could swear I heard an alarm clock ringing, screaming for me to wake up from this all too familiar dreamy act. Isn’t that a tad bit too shabby, Alden? That line has been abused too many times, for too long. It was a bit inadequate, to tell you the truth. What with all emotions running high all over the world. And all over twitter world! Hah!

Then you wrote this: “But it was really nice seeing you” And that, my man, swept me off my feet! Suddenly, those same words from Maine after you first met flashed back in front of my eyes! It’s simplicity is what made it stupefying. It was so sincere my eyes welled up in horripilation!

There it is, in all its glory, the final validation. Dude, she got you! Nicomaine Dei Capili Mendoza got you real good! ~ Vilo